Tomorrow will be the second to last cycle of chemotherapy. The second to last time I'll have to sit for hours while they pump me with fluids and poison to kill the other poison in my body. The second to last time I get to complain about how badly I feel for 7-10 days. The second to last time I have an excuse for not wanting to do things and only wanting to sleep!
I'm finally on the homestretch but the finish line still seems so far away. I wish there was a way I could finish without having to run this last leg. I'm so tired and exhausted of feeling tired and exhausted.
We had some pretty bad weather here in Baltimore yesterday evening, making the commute home miserable for many people. I was one of the lucky ones who didn't have to spend hours upon hours waiting to move an inch or two on the roads that had turned into parking lots. But for those of you who found themselves stuck in the worst ever traffic jam, I think you can feel the frustration I feel with my life. I feel stuck in one place, wanting to get to where I want to go but without a way to get there; I have no control of what is ahead or behind me, I am at the mercy of the current situation without a say in any of it. I want it to be over but the end seems nowhere in sight, I know things will get better but I just don't know when.
It's so sad to me that I'm so close to the end yet more depressed than ever. I know I'll get through it, I just wish there was an easier way!
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